she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize