i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
