we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Two words: nipple clamps
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