How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize