shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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