You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
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