Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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