Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
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