Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
