so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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