Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
you will always have a special place in my vag
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
