she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
