My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
