the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
