I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
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