Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
