I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
