I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
you traded sex for a burrito?
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
