I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
