pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Two words: blizzard sex
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Randomize
