i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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