I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Randomize
