Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
