we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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