I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Randomize
