I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Randomize
