Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
