I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
