He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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