You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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