just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
