im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
