Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
