just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
