Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize