rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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