Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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