I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
