The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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