That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
