Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Randomize
