I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Randomize
