We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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