Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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