Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
