ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
