I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize