did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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