I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize