This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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